Please see my ad on the Psychology Today website
https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_detail.php?profid=311392&ref=1&sid=1485713843.0055_9363&city=Memphis&county=Shelby&state=TN&spec=187&tr=ResultsName
Sunday, January 29, 2017
What is gender?
What
is gender? Much of the work I do involves gender, so it is certainly
something I think about on a regular basis. However, our understanding
of what gender is has changed over time and in different societies. The
history is absolutely fascinating, but for the purposes of this post, I
want to focus only on how it is conceptualized now in our society, and
give brief descriptions of some of the gender identities being used.
When most people think about their own gender, they use their physical bodies, and more specifically their genitalia, to define their gender as either a man or a woman. This works fine for many people, because their gender identity and their physical body are in agreement. However, it is not always the case that gender and physical body agree (I am saying physical body instead of sex intentionally. Often the word sex, or biological sex, is used instead of physical body, and while that often works, their are also folks whose physical bodies - genitals and secondary sexual characteristics - don't match their hormonal levels or chromosomal make-up. For this reason I use the phrase physical body, to avoid conflating any of the above factors when they really shouldn't be).
Okay, so then gender identity can be thought of as a person's internal sense of who they are as a gendered being, or what gender they identify with. It used to be, in our society at least, that gender was limited only to male and female, and was assumed to be consistent with physical body, so something that couldn't be changed. Last century, some brave individuals and their medical providers started exploring the idea of gender and physical body not matching, and looking at ways to bring them into alignment. One of those ways was attempts to use therapy to help a person change their gender identity so that it agreed with their physical body. Therefore, if someone had a penis and the ability to grow facial hair, they were encouraged to open themselves to the "fact" that they are male and should identify as such. Likewise, someone with a vagina and breasts would be encouraged to identify as a woman, even if that went against their internal sense of self.
That treatment failed dismally, with people simply being unable to changed their gender identity. Consequently, some individuals and their medical providers explored ways to change their physical bodies to be more aligned with their gender. Today we understand this process as transitioning, which may include the use of hormone therapy and gender-confirming surgery (but not always).
Another shift that we have seen more recently is the idea that gender is not limited to only male or female, pick one, for each individual. Certainly for many people they are able to choose one, and it is the same as the one assigned at birth. For others they can also pick one, but it is not the one they were assigned at birth. However, there is a portion of the population whose internal sense of gender does not fit neatly into the categories of male or female. There are a number of identities being used now that describe gender beyond just male or female. Some of them include agender, genderfluid, genderqueer, bi-gender, and nonbinary.
Agender, genderfluid, nonbinary, and bi-gender describe someone whose identity is not man or woman, may fall on a spectrum that includes masculinity and femininity, or feels as though they do not have a gender. Genderfluid indicates that gender may shift for some people, such that some days they feel more masculine and some days more feminine. These gender identities are all real, as we realize that gender is much more complex than the male and female boxes we have tried to put everyone into up until recently.
When most people think about their own gender, they use their physical bodies, and more specifically their genitalia, to define their gender as either a man or a woman. This works fine for many people, because their gender identity and their physical body are in agreement. However, it is not always the case that gender and physical body agree (I am saying physical body instead of sex intentionally. Often the word sex, or biological sex, is used instead of physical body, and while that often works, their are also folks whose physical bodies - genitals and secondary sexual characteristics - don't match their hormonal levels or chromosomal make-up. For this reason I use the phrase physical body, to avoid conflating any of the above factors when they really shouldn't be).
Okay, so then gender identity can be thought of as a person's internal sense of who they are as a gendered being, or what gender they identify with. It used to be, in our society at least, that gender was limited only to male and female, and was assumed to be consistent with physical body, so something that couldn't be changed. Last century, some brave individuals and their medical providers started exploring the idea of gender and physical body not matching, and looking at ways to bring them into alignment. One of those ways was attempts to use therapy to help a person change their gender identity so that it agreed with their physical body. Therefore, if someone had a penis and the ability to grow facial hair, they were encouraged to open themselves to the "fact" that they are male and should identify as such. Likewise, someone with a vagina and breasts would be encouraged to identify as a woman, even if that went against their internal sense of self.
That treatment failed dismally, with people simply being unable to changed their gender identity. Consequently, some individuals and their medical providers explored ways to change their physical bodies to be more aligned with their gender. Today we understand this process as transitioning, which may include the use of hormone therapy and gender-confirming surgery (but not always).
Another shift that we have seen more recently is the idea that gender is not limited to only male or female, pick one, for each individual. Certainly for many people they are able to choose one, and it is the same as the one assigned at birth. For others they can also pick one, but it is not the one they were assigned at birth. However, there is a portion of the population whose internal sense of gender does not fit neatly into the categories of male or female. There are a number of identities being used now that describe gender beyond just male or female. Some of them include agender, genderfluid, genderqueer, bi-gender, and nonbinary.
Agender, genderfluid, nonbinary, and bi-gender describe someone whose identity is not man or woman, may fall on a spectrum that includes masculinity and femininity, or feels as though they do not have a gender. Genderfluid indicates that gender may shift for some people, such that some days they feel more masculine and some days more feminine. These gender identities are all real, as we realize that gender is much more complex than the male and female boxes we have tried to put everyone into up until recently.
Why am I a psychologist?
Why am I a psychologist? Sometimes therapists refrain from talking
about themselves in therapy. While I don't talk about myself much, I
think it can be helpful for clients to know about my experiences when it
can benefit their work. I also think it's reasonable for folks to know
why I do what I do. So here goes...
I suppose many therapists might answer the question with some form of "because I like helping people." For me this is absolutely true, but it's not a full explanation of why I went to college for 14 years and put all that time, effort, and expense into it. A better explanation starts with the fact that I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder when I was 15 years old. Early on I really struggled, but I worked with a social worker for several years, then a psychologist while in undergraduate school, and today I live with it and enjoy a full life. I know how important counseling was to me, quite frankly just in keeping me alive, and decided that I wanted to be able to do that for other people. That's really why I became a psychologist.
I suppose many therapists might answer the question with some form of "because I like helping people." For me this is absolutely true, but it's not a full explanation of why I went to college for 14 years and put all that time, effort, and expense into it. A better explanation starts with the fact that I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder when I was 15 years old. Early on I really struggled, but I worked with a social worker for several years, then a psychologist while in undergraduate school, and today I live with it and enjoy a full life. I know how important counseling was to me, quite frankly just in keeping me alive, and decided that I wanted to be able to do that for other people. That's really why I became a psychologist.
Another reason I think it's important for me to be open with the fact
that I live with mental illness, is that we live in a society where
there is huge stigma around mental illness. Many people are too ashamed
to even admit to themselves, much less anyone else, that they might be
struggling with something. Mental illness is real. According to the
National Alliance on Mental Illness, approximately 1 in 5 adults
experiences mental illness in a given year. This means almost 44 million
people could benefit from mental health services every year, but many
don't reach out and so don't get the help they need. As someone who
knows that mental illness can be overcome, this makes me very sad.
I'm a psychologist, I have a very good life, and I live with mental illness. It does not have to control your life. You can get help, and you can overcome it. Please feel free to call me - confidentially - if you need more information (901-486-5745).
I'm a psychologist, I have a very good life, and I live with mental illness. It does not have to control your life. You can get help, and you can overcome it. Please feel free to call me - confidentially - if you need more information (901-486-5745).
Biofeedback
Biofeedback is another treatment modality I use. It is very different
from "talk therapy", so it may be something you have never done before,
or even heard about. It is based on the biological connection between
heart rate and numerous bodily functions and awareness, including
emotions. It starts with a sensor that clips to your earlobe and
measures your heart rate. The sensor also connects to my phone and I use
a special application to do it (of course, because there is an application
for everything these days). Using the sensor, the application
calculates heart rate variability, which is the slight variation between
heart beats; our heart does not beat nearly as regularly as we probably
think.
The way we make
changes if through our breathing. This isn't really meditation, although
the theory behind it explains why meditation works. It isn't
relaxation, although that often happens as a part of it. However, using
controlled breathing, we can actually synchronize the systems in our
body which brings us to a state of coherence, or balance if you will.
Learning to get yourself into a state of coherence several times a day
can help to reduce many psychological problems, including depression and
anxiety. It is a great tool for stress management as well. Give me a
call if you'd like to learn more! 901-486-5745
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is one treatment modality that I
utilize. Research has demonstrated that it is very effective in treating
a wide range of mental illnesses and other difficulties. It focuses on
the development of personal coping strategies that target solving
current problems and changing unhelpful patterns in cognitions
(thoughts, beliefs, attitudes), behaviors, and emotional regulation. It
was originally developed to treat depression. It is action-focused, and
is a collaboration between the client and the therapist. Research has
demonstrated that it is as effective as medication in treating less
severe forms of depression and anxiety, so often it can be used without
supplementing with medication. With more severe mental illness, a
combination of CBT and medication is most effective.
Meet Nimbus the therapy cat
Meet Nimbus the therapy cat! I've always known Nimbus was a really
sweet guy, but I had no idea he is the perfect therapy cat until I
started doing sessions with him around. He's the perfect therapy animal
because he makes himself available if folks want to pet him, but he
doesn't demand it. During a session he typically sits on a footstool
within easy reach of the client. If they want to pet him he's perfectly
happy to oblige them, but if they don't want to then he just naps. Sometimes instead he sleeps near them on the couch, where he can be petted but it isn't a requirement.
What has sealed it for him being a therapy cat, though, is his reaction
when a client becomes upset (sad). When this happens, he often moves so
that he is on the couch and lies down up against the client's leg. He
still doesn't ask to be petted, but he seems to want to offer comfort in
physical contact.
These behaviors weren't trained, he's just hard-wired this way. So many clients have said what a benefit it is having him around during sessions. He contributes significantly to my work, and I'm really grateful to have him as my assistant.
These behaviors weren't trained, he's just hard-wired this way. So many clients have said what a benefit it is having him around during sessions. He contributes significantly to my work, and I'm really grateful to have him as my assistant.
Carrie Fisher on mental illness
I'm fine, but I'm bipolar. I'm on seven medications, and I take
medication three times a day. This constantly puts me in touch with the
illness I have. I'm never quite allowed to be free of that for a day.
It's like being a diabetic.
Carrie Fisher
If you know me at all, you know I am a supreme Star Wars fan, and adore Carrie Fisher. I quote her here, however, because she was open and unapologetic about having mental illness, and sometimes really struggling with it. We live in a society with such a stigma around mental illness, such that it can be quite embarrassing for folks to admit they do, or even that they are in counseling.
Carrie Fisher
If you know me at all, you know I am a supreme Star Wars fan, and adore Carrie Fisher. I quote her here, however, because she was open and unapologetic about having mental illness, and sometimes really struggling with it. We live in a society with such a stigma around mental illness, such that it can be quite embarrassing for folks to admit they do, or even that they are in counseling.
If you are struggling with things in your life, be it mental illness or
something else for which you are considering therapy, please know that
the real strength lies in facing your demons and reaching out for the
help that you need. It's okay if you don't want to be public about it,
but do what you need to do to take care of yourself. You're worth it.
Hope
Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the
darkness. -Desmond Tutu. Sometimes it is hard to be hopeful when we are
faced with problems in our life. Oftentimes claiming hope is the first
step towards overcoming challenges, whether they be depression or
anxiety, relationship stressors, or accepting and flourishing as
individuals with multiple identities. From the onset of our time working
together, we will establish hope as a foundation. From there we can
address whatever burdens you carry together, to give you the knowledge
and skills you need to live fully and happily.
The reason for Hiestand Psychological Services
In May 2015 I learned that OutMemphis (what was then the Memphis Gay and
Lesbian Community Center) received numerous calls from individuals
trying to get mental health services but having a difficult time finding
professionals willing to work with them. From this conversation I
established Hiestand Psychological Services, because people wanting
mental health therapy shouldn't be turned away by therapists because of who or how they love, or because of their gender identity.
I earned my Doctorate of Philosophy (Ph.D.) in Psychology from the University of Memphis. I am licensed by the Tennessee Board of Psychology as a licensed psychologist, mental health practitioner, having fulfilled all the requirements for this designation. I am a member in good standing of the American Psychological Association.
I offer services including therapy/counseling for individuals, couples, families, and groups. As a psychologist, I do not provide any medications or perform any medical treatments. If medication seems indicated, I maintain close working relationships with a number of physicians and psychiatrists and I will gladly refer you to these practitioners.
My theoretical orientation is Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). This is a very effective therapy for a vast number of concerns, and its effectiveness has extensive support in evidence-based research. When working with one or more individuals, I typically conceptualize things in terms of thoughts and behaviors, how they influence each other, and how one can be changed to help the individual(s) feel better. While I focus more on thoughts and behaviors, I am also skilled and comfortable working with emotions, and when that is warranted, I will focus in that realm.
I have extensive experience working in a number of areas, including depression, anxiety, relationship and family problems, LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender) issues, basic life concerns such as transitions in employment and education, bipolar disorder, personality disorders, schizophrenia, grief, mental retardation, and post-traumatic stress disorder. I am competent to work with individuals with any diagnosis recognized by the psychological/psychiatric community. I typically work with adults, and will see anyone age 16 and above for any reason. For individuals seeking services for LGBT concerns, I will make a decision on a case-by-case basis.
One potential benefit of therapy is the ability to detect, challenge, and change those beliefs and attitudes that create, maintain, and worsen conditions such as depression, anxiety, panic, anger, frustration, fear, etc. Sometimes there are potential risks when entering any therapy relationship. Some people may experience a degree of discomfort, feelings of sadness, anxiety, anger, etc. when working through difficult issues. Some may recall unpleasant aspects of their life and at times, report feeling worse before feeling better. My desire is for people to be strengthened individually and in their relationships.
I earned my Doctorate of Philosophy (Ph.D.) in Psychology from the University of Memphis. I am licensed by the Tennessee Board of Psychology as a licensed psychologist, mental health practitioner, having fulfilled all the requirements for this designation. I am a member in good standing of the American Psychological Association.
I offer services including therapy/counseling for individuals, couples, families, and groups. As a psychologist, I do not provide any medications or perform any medical treatments. If medication seems indicated, I maintain close working relationships with a number of physicians and psychiatrists and I will gladly refer you to these practitioners.
My theoretical orientation is Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). This is a very effective therapy for a vast number of concerns, and its effectiveness has extensive support in evidence-based research. When working with one or more individuals, I typically conceptualize things in terms of thoughts and behaviors, how they influence each other, and how one can be changed to help the individual(s) feel better. While I focus more on thoughts and behaviors, I am also skilled and comfortable working with emotions, and when that is warranted, I will focus in that realm.
I have extensive experience working in a number of areas, including depression, anxiety, relationship and family problems, LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender) issues, basic life concerns such as transitions in employment and education, bipolar disorder, personality disorders, schizophrenia, grief, mental retardation, and post-traumatic stress disorder. I am competent to work with individuals with any diagnosis recognized by the psychological/psychiatric community. I typically work with adults, and will see anyone age 16 and above for any reason. For individuals seeking services for LGBT concerns, I will make a decision on a case-by-case basis.
One potential benefit of therapy is the ability to detect, challenge, and change those beliefs and attitudes that create, maintain, and worsen conditions such as depression, anxiety, panic, anger, frustration, fear, etc. Sometimes there are potential risks when entering any therapy relationship. Some people may experience a degree of discomfort, feelings of sadness, anxiety, anger, etc. when working through difficult issues. Some may recall unpleasant aspects of their life and at times, report feeling worse before feeling better. My desire is for people to be strengthened individually and in their relationships.
People should not be denied mental health services based on who or how
they love, or because of their gender experience. Far too many people
are denied mental health services for these reasons, which is why
Hiestand Psychological Services was established. For more information,
please contact KT Hiestand, Ph.D., at 901-486-5745
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)